"You have a relapse."

March 29:  It's the beginning of spring so once again I find myself at Barnes Hospital for routine scans.  Although I have been in remission for 6 years, I still visit my oncologist twice a year just to check in... she has never been 100% satisfied with my health post-cancer.  I visited the department of nuclear medicine for my PET scan, laid in a tube, and took a nice nap while they took pictures.  I return to school that day and bragged to my co-teacher about feeling incredibly healthy and how I can't wait for Wednesday's happy hour to celebrate another successful doctor's appointment.

March 30:  Missed call: Dr.'s Office at Siteman Center.  I called my doctor's coordinator back immediately wondering why on earth she could be calling.  It is routine for me to have my scans on Monday, and meet with my oncologist on Wednesday after the results are in.  Today is Tuesday, I'm confused...  "Hi Melissa, I'm calling because we saw some "uptake" on your scans and the doctor would like to run some more tests something something something something...."  I'm pretty sure I blanked out for the rest of our 8 minute phone convo.

March 31:  The appointment started off great.  The tech drawing my blood asked if I was a model (love a good ego boost before I'm being told I have cancer!).  In the waiting room I ALMOST beat my sister at a word search (a waiting room ritual, and something I continually lose at - don't you think she would let me win one especially knowing I was moments away from being told my cancer was back?!).  We met with the doctor and sure enough, she has discovered two new masses in my chest, one resting on the outside of my lungs and one inside my right lung (well, at least now we know why I cough so much!).  It will not be confirmed that this is the Hodgkin's until a biopsy is performed.  Here we go again... time for my sister (the awesome caregiver) and I to prepare for some life changes... pre-cancer meeting happy hour HERE WE COME!

The next week consisted of more appointments, more scans, more blood work, a consultation with my pulmonary surgeon, and answering A LOT of repetitious questions.  Why can't I just have one giant file for every department to review instead of me repeating every single surgery I have had since 2003?  (And count it, I'm up to 9).

April 11:  Biopsy day.  Considering I had my throat cut open and an extremely uncomfortable breathing tube scratch my throat, I couldn't complain much.  Oh, except for that heparin shot in my belly - I don't recommend that one!  With the care of the most amazing sister in the world, and an anesthesiologist who made me feel like I was filling out a dating application instead of my pre-op info (although he was pretty nice to look at :) I would say surgery was a success.  Now time to sit on the couch for the rest of the week and eat ice cream, socialize with visitors, have all meals made for me, and be waited on hand and foot.  Not too shabby!   Oh, and wait around for the phone to ring, hoping to hear there was a fly on the camera lens and it just simply appeared to be a tumor.  Ha, wish me luck on that one...

April 14:  Phone call:  "Hi Melissa, we have your results back and it is for sure the Hodgkin's."  This time I was prepared with pen and paper and made her repeat every detail because my brain was not AT ALL interested in learning about chemo options.  Here is what I learned so far:  I will be enrolling in a clinical trial (considering the chemo for my Hodgkin's Lymphoma did not work the first time, it is not believed to be successful a second time.  So on to experimental drugs).  The drug I will be taking comes in PILL FORM.  WOOOO HOOOO!!  I will be on a CHEMO PILL!!!  Goodness, the advances in medicine today are remarkable!  With this new drug I am not expected to lose my hair (hooray!) and should expect very little nausea.  This is the BEST news I have heard in weeks!!

I meet with my oncologist again on Wednesday to learn all the details (and ask my 29843849 questions) and pick up my chemo pills.  Oh, and they squeezed in a bone marrow biopsy for that day as well... sneaky bastards (and the biopsy is only to make sure it hasn't spread to the bone marrow).  

"Treatment" begins Thursday in the comfort of my own home :). 

All and all, for having cancer, life is good.